Death Blows for Bludgeoning Weapons!

Did you just crush your enemy with a Club, Cudgel, Hammer, Mace, Maul, Morning Star, Stave, Stone, or Unarmed Strike? Yaaaar! Roll d100 for Body Location, then roll d100 again to find out how they leave the land of the living!

Body Location

Legs 1-30

Body 31-59

Arms 60-89

Head 90-100

Death Blow Results

LEGS

1-5 You mince the lousy degenerate’s feet, leaving him balanced atop bloody stubs! He collapses to the ground writhing. The pain is too much and he soon departs for the shadow lands.

6-10 You clatter the awful assassin’s ankles! He falls to the ground in a howling rage. Bones protrude from the flesh and his life slowly leaks away.

11-15 You rattle your stinking assailant’s thighs! He laughs out loud, but soon the color drains from his face and his taunts give way to fear. Something has gone wrong inside him, and his decline into death is rapid.

16-20 With a sickening crunch you ruin your terrible foe’s knees! He crumples to the ground screaming curses at you and your ancestors, then recedes into the abyss. You laugh at his curses and receive +1 to hit and +1 damage on your next attack this combat.

21-25 With a massive blow you break the odoriferous creep’s fibula, causing a nasty compound fracture. He slumps to the ground with a sigh and expires.

26-30 You clap the sleazy lout’s buttocks! He fixes you with wild eyes, shrieks in pain, and descends into Hades cursing his shameful death.

31-35 Your battle cry rings over the field and you pulverize the formidable devil’s crotch! He hops this way and that to escape the agony but the suffering is too great and soon his life force ebbs. You receive an extra attack this round as a bonus action!

36-40 With a stinging hit you shatter the nasty desperado’s hip bone! He giggles maniacally then his face freezes in a thoughtful look, as though listening to a far-off song. Abruptly, he gives up the ghost. All PCs in squares adjacent to the death Save DC 13 WIS or suffer -2 to hit on their next attack this combat.

41-45 You thrash the putrid fiend’s knees, dislocating both kneecaps! He howls in agony and sinks to the ground spitting insults in your direction. Soon he goes the way of all flesh.

46-50 You whack the dreadful spy’s lower legs! He sinks to the earth clutching the wound. His breathing quickens, then suddenly stops.

51-55 You jar the ghastly raider’s quad muscle! He lets out a sickening shriek and attempts to limp away from combat. But his spirit slackens and he soon sinks into everlasting sleep.

56-60 You smear the offending hood’s feet into a bloody paste! He stares sorrowfully at his mangled feet then collapses into a dying heap.

61-65 You demolish the uncultured traitor’s hamstrings! He crumples to the ground clutching his destroyed legs, and relinquishes life with a string of foul curses.

66-70 You smash the foul felon’s toes! He grins to mask the pain but suddenly an odd look clouds his face and he falls to the ground, stone dead.

71-75 You lambaste the ignorant rascal across the thighs! He groans at the insult, then keels over and fades into the nether world.

76-80 You destroy the uncouth convict’s groin! He wilts like a flower in hot weather, curling into a fetal ball of death.

81-85 You bash the scurrilous backbiter’s shins! The shattered bones slice arteries, spraying blood everywhere. Wide-eyed, he attempts to outpace death with a horrible, hopping run, but it soon catches up to him.

86-90 With a calculated blow, you devastate the impudent racketeer’s knee joint! He slumps over howling, and tries to knit his sundered bones. But it is too late for that. The boatman calls him to the black river. The odd scene spooks you, Save DC 13 WIS or suffer -1 to hit on your next attack this combat.

91-95 With a venomous strike, you pulp the repulsive rebel’s hipbone! His body gives out and he flops over awkwardly, sniveling for mercy. But the reaper ignores his cries and purgatory awaits. PCs adjacent to the fallen monster get +2 to hit on their next attack this combat.

96-00 You burst the uncivil beast’s femur! The bone protrudes from the leg in a revulsive mess of blood and flesh. Death calls soon thereafter.

BODY

1-5 You hammer the clan-member’s paunch! It swells massively as his guts leak between the muscle and the skin. He whimpers in pain, then keels over.

6-10 You shellac the beast’s side with a brutal blow! His ribs cave in, puncturing a lung. His breath rattles, he fixes you with an evil stare, then departs for the eternal black lands. You receive +2 to hit on your next attack this combat.

11-15 You pound the loathsome lawbreaker’s ribcage! He doubles over, gasping for breath and retching up blood. He utters a muffled curse, then descends into hellfire. Save DC 12 INT to resist the curse, or suffer -2 AC next round.

16-20 You drub the ungracious brute’s breastbone! He clutches his battered chest and looks about frantically. His body seizes, and he goes down to Gehenna.

21-25 You lay waste to the wild sadist’s stomach! He pukes up a stream of black bile then buckles under to the pain.

26-30 You batter your unrefined opponent’s chest! He struggles for air, wobbles to and fro on loose legs for a moment, then succumbs to his wound.

31-35 You crater the odious scoundrel’s solar plexus! Blue blood and pus ooze from the wound, he stumbles to the ground, and his spirit melts slowly away.

36-40 You absolutely crush the revolting wrongdoer’s pectoral muscle! He screams in outrage, insulting your family lineage for generations, then departs for the River Styx. The insults stoke your righteous anger, and you receive +2 damage on you next attack this combat.

41-45 You wreck the boorish hoodlum’s liver! He vomits green mucus onto the battlefield, clutches his side, then his soul departs.

46-50 You annihilate the sickening falsifier’s belly! His guts burst out onto his feet in a stinking pile. He gapes in disbelief, then submits to eternal sleep. You are disgusted by the sight, Save DC 12 CON or suffer -1 to hit next round as you shake of the nausea.

51-55 You clobber the abhorrent miscreant’s midsection! He spits up blood, stumbles to his knees, then embarks on the dark journey to meet his gods.

56-60 You jolt the irritating informer’s floating ribs! He struggles to breath with punctured lungs, staggers to the ground at your feet, then gives up the ghost.

61-65 You cudgel the fusty killer right in the guts! He doubles over in agony, spitting curses in a dark tongue, then yields to the long sleep.

66-70 You welt the corrupt vilifier’s kidneys! “My soul shall find yours in the afterlife,” he sputters, then goes down into limbo.

71-75 With a stout shot you obliterate the cheeky mugger’s ribcage! He slumps to the ground wheezing, and accedes to death shortly thereafter.

76-80 You thunder the invidious monster’s abdomen! He pukes up the gnawed hindquarters of a rabbit, then writhes about on the ground until the light fades from his eyes. The find the sight oddly inspiring and receive +2 damage on your next attack this combat.

81-85 You shock the annoying misfit’s clavicle with a vicious blow! Bones protrude from his flesh at odd angles and he sinks down into the black pit with hatred in his eyes.

86-90 You flog your hateful adversary’s sternum! His lungs fill with blood and the gurgling sound of his last labored breaths fills your ears until the silence takes hold.

91-95 You slam the distasteful goon in the ribs! He coughs up pink foam, winces in anguish, and his vital spark dims down to nothing.

96-00 You bludgeon the impolite ruffian’s chest cavity! His ribs cave in, puncturing his heart and killing him instantly. You receive an extra attack this round, as a bonus action.

ARMS

1-5 You blackjack your enemy’s hand, leaving him with a wad of mangled bone and flesh! He hisses in pain, cradles his ruined hand, then seizes and dies before your eyes. You’re inspired by the strange death and receive +1 to hit on your next attack this combat.

6-10 You crush the obscene offender’s knuckles! He releases a high-pitched squeak, his pupils dilate, and he falls over lifeless.

11-15 You smash the nauseating antihero’s shoulder joint into an unrecognizable mush. He lets out a pitiful wail then bows down to death.

16-20 You clout the wretch’s forearm with a savage blow! Bones protrude from his flesh and a rich spray of blood coats your face. Arteries have been severed and he is not long for this world. You wipe the blood from your eyes with a grin and receive +2 damage on your next attack this combat.

21-25 You lay the inconsiderate scofflaw’s elbow in ruins! He cries shamefully for his forefathers and the pain makes him dance a macabre jig before he passes on to the underworld.

26-30 You bludgeon the savage betrayer’s fingers! He sobs in agony, staring at his pulped hand, then whispers a curse at you before the darkness takes him. Save DC 14 WIS or suffer -2 to hit on your next attack this combat.

31-35 You crack your loutish rival’s radius! He screams and hops about, clutching his shattered arm. “This cannot be!” he wails. “The omens favored me!” Omens or no omens, he soon collapses in death.

36-40 You destroy the crude trespasser’s upper arm! Massive and rapid swelling tells of the bleeding within. His face goes pale, he wavers on his feet, then crashes to the earth.

41-45 You cave in the malignant critter’s wrist! The hand hangs by a thread, the snapped bones of his arm ooze marrow and blood. He stares at the mess in disbelief, then calls to the crows. You are haunted by the scene and must Save DC 14 WIS or suffer -2 AC next round.

46-50 You pummel the lousy mobster’s forearm, reducing it to ruins! He staggers backward cursing your race and your family name. But his tirade is cut short. The wound is too much and he suddenly keels over in death.

51-55 You wallop the offensive animal’s bicep, battering flesh and crunching bone! He emits a sickening wail then slumps to the ground.

56-60 You smack the repugnant hooligan’s forearm with such force that it hangs limp from the elbow! His eyes roll back in his head and he sags to the floor.

61-65 You blast the intrusive swine’s triceps with a blow that shatters his arm! He fixes you with mournful glare, then goes to meet his evil gods.

66-70 You bash the reeking cannibal’s upper arm, sending blood spatter across the battlefield! He his violently flung to the ground, where he rolls wildly about until death takes him. Your victory is invigorating and you receive +1 to hit on your next attack this combat.

71-75 You hammer the beast’s shoulder joint beyond all repair! The blow makes a sickening, hollow sound and your victim wails as the vultures of Hades call to him.

76-80 You lambaste the disagreeable troublemaker’s elbow joint! He flails about, dripping blood from pulped muscle and shattered bone. Soon his life force ebbs and he sinks to the earth.

81-85 You wreck the revulsive defiler’s wrist and his hand hangs limp! The grievous wound is too much for him and sits down in a sad heap to die.

86-90 You flatten the abusive fugitive’s hand! He squawks in anguish, fawning over his destroyed hand until the pain takes him.

91-95 You blast the barbaric guerilla’s arm! His splintered humerus slices between his ribs, puncturing his heart. Death is instantaneous.

96-00 You splatter the hideous mischief-maker’s shoulder! He is flung roughly to the ground where he twitches for a moment, then is still. You receive an extra attack this round as a bonus action!

HEAD

1-5 You beat the bridge of your malefactor’s nose into an unrecognizable divot! He snorts out a wad of mucus and blood, screeches in pain from the effort, then collapses to the ground.

6-10 You cudgel the evil enemy’s temple, cracking his skull with a loud pop! He emits a single high-pitched squeal, looks into the distance as though recognizing a friend, then dies.

11-15 You ravage the repellant thug’s orbital ridge, smashing his face and eye socket into splintered pulp! He whimpers pitifully, then sags to the ground.

16-20 You crush the creature’s skull like a hammer smashing a melon! He perishes silently and instantly.

21-25 You bash the stinking lowlife’s forehead, sending eggy brain matter flying in all directions for 1d12 feet!

26-30 You ruin the malodorous transgressor’s chin, unhinging his lower jaw so that it hangs only by the jowls of his mouth! His scream comes out as a guttural, formless howl and death soon follows.

31-35 You cream the grisly miscreant right in the teeth! You must wrench your weapon free, leaving his mouth bloody hole of shattered bone. He moans unintelligibly then his evil spirit departs.

36-40 You land a thunderous blow upon the surly delinquent’s ear, caving in his head! He seizes on the ground, then expires.

41-45 You blast the crown of the antagonist’s skull, exploding it completely! Blood and brains erupt out, coating you in a grey and purple sheen. You receive +1 to hit and +1 damage next round.

46-50 You shatter the blackguard’s cheek bone with a blow that devastates his face! He shambles about aimlessly on shaky legs for a moment, then collapses.

51-55 You savage the thief’s eyes with a clobbering blow! He stumbles about wailing blindly then trips over his own feet and sobs on the ground until death arrives. The macabre sight rattles you, Save DC 13 WIS or suffer -2 AC next round.

56-60 You pulverize the monster’s jaw, sending teeth, blood, and spittle flying! He careens wildly, clutching at his horrible wound, then departs for the underworld.

61-65 You mash the vile attacker’s throat, snapping his spine instantly! He falls rigid and lifeless to the ground, stiff as a fallen tree.

66-70 You squash the bandit’s ear, shattering his skull and leaving behind a mass of ruined flesh!

71-75 You macerate the swine’s cheekbone, burying your weapon in his face! He falls moaning to the ground, you place your boot on his forehead to wrench your weapon free. Death takes him shortly thereafter. You receive +2 to hit on your next attack this combat.

76-80 You flatten the brute’s nose with a blow that craters his face! His ability to breathe is severely compromised, he casts about frantically for a solution, but none arrives.

81-85 You wreck the rude yardbird’s jaw, nearly separating it from his skull! His jaw hangs by a meaty thread, helplessly he tries to replace it, then the shock wears off and he slumps to the ground dead. The sight is disturbing, you must Save DC 12 WIS or lose your next action.

86-90 You bash in the detestable terrorist’s eyes, leaving a dark hole in his face that he takes down to Gehenna!

91-95 You rumple the rotten gangster’s forehead, leaving a massive dent of pulverized fresh and shattered bone. He stares at you through his ruined eyes for a moment before they go dark.

96-00 You crunch the rank murderer’s skull, sinking your weapon deep into his brain! You howl with glee and receive an extra attack as a bonus action this round!