Critical Hits for Slashing Weapons!

Did you just slice a monster with your Dagger, Sword, Polearm, or other mortal blade? Calculate your damage, roll d100 for body location, then roll d100 again to find out what happens!

Body Location

Legs 1-30

Body 31-59

Arms 60-89

Head 90-100

Critical Hit Results

LEGS

1-5 You mutilate the mugger’s foot! He howls and hops about, cursing you in a shrill voice.

6-10 You bayonet the evildoer’s toes! He screams in outrage and leaves a trail of bloody footprints wherever he steps.

11-15 You split the stinking saboteur’s ankle! He fixes you with a black stare and tries to conceal the wound as best he can.

16-20 You jag the animal’s thighs! He limps from side to side, then grits his teeth to resume combat.

21-25 Your blow lacerates the killer’s hamstring! He seethes something in a foreign tongue at you, under his breath.

26-30 With a flourish, you gouge the ruffian’s buttocks! He grunts with shame and looks about to ensure that none of his allies witnessed this embarrassment.

31-35 You bury your blade in the villain’s toes, severing several of them clean off! Leaking blood, he stares in disbelief at his severed toes, and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of combat.

36-40 Your dastardly blow rents the degenerate’s heel open wide! He dances an ugly jig and hoots with evil glee to show you how little your blow affects him.

41-45 You bisect the traitor’s kneecaps! He wails in dismay then grins at you horribly.

46-50 With haughty precision you incise the hoodlum’s buttocks! He stumbles backward in rage. You receive +2 to hit him on your next attack.

51-55 You slice open the culprit’s calf muscle! He clutches his wound sobbing, then stands up straight with a cold light in his eyes.

56-60 You stab the critter right in the groin! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

61-65 You mangle the dirty malefactor’s pelvis! He moans loudly for his allies to come to his aid.

66-70 You sever your opponent’s Achilles’ tendon! He shuffles about, dragging his wounded leg, and hisses at you.

71-75 You absolutely furrow the trespasser’s foot! He shudders in pain and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

76-80 You lance the delinquent’s shin with a cruel blow! He shrinks back from the wound, and his face goes pale with rage.

81-85 You cleave the surly scoundrel’s quadriceps! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

86-90 You part the flesh of the hustler’s inner thigh! He clutches feverishly at the wound to staunch the flow of blood and curses you to the nine hells.

91-95 You slit the rascal’s hip crease! He shrieks in agony and caterwauls to the side, almost as though dancing.

96-00 You rend the fiend’s knee joint! He bellows in pain, buckles under the blow, and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

BODY

1-5 You cut the cannibal’s paunch, exposing a layer of yellow fat beneath the skin!

6-10 You sunder the felon’s chest! Splinters of his ribs show through the bloody flesh.

11-15 You carve the gangster’s sternum! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

16-20 You gash the hooligan’s solar plexus! He gasps for breath, then scorns your lucky blow.

21-25 You shank the dirty deuce’s pectoral muscle! He laughs in your face and seems to shrug off the wound.

26-30 You blow hews the punk’s side! He howls in agony and grimaces at the ribs now protruding from the gash.

31-35 You rive the convict’s ribs! He staggers under the blow and clutches at the open wound.

36-40 You slash your rival’s stomach! A stinking, purplish bile leaks down his side, but he seems undeterred and squares up for his next attack.

41-45 Your blow clefts the yardbird’s liver! He lets out a high wail to his dark gods, then curses your grandmother and all of her progeny.

46-50 Your blow chops deep into the goon’s lung! He wheezes, hacks up buttery bloody, and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

51-55 You rip the wrongdoer under their arm! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

56-60 You score the mangy heel’s chest! He roars out a surly challenge and throws a small bronze trinket onto the ground.

61-65 You furrow the criminal’s ribs, exposing white bone! He hums a sad lament, ever glancing at his wound, and he suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

66-70 You cleft the brute’s side! He spits a wad of black mucus in your face, DC 12 DEX Save to avoid the putrid spittle.

71-75 You rip the lout’s stomach! The smell of rotten, roasted meat fills your nostrils and you gag in the stench.

76-80 You stab the slanderer’s abdomen! He folds over the blow with a look of horror then, looking up, fixes you with a glare of unsullied hatred as he clutches his guts.

81-85 You slit the falsifier’s chest! He releases a bestial howl that raises the hair on the back of your neck.

86-90 You sunder the clan member’s kidney! He shudders in agony as scarlet, bubbling blood drips down your blade.

91-95 You gash the betrayer’s guts! A pile of reeking, partially digested fish oozes onto the ground, making you wretch. Your opponent suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of combat.

96-00 You slice open the monster’s chest cavity! Fragments of bone and severed arteries tell a grim tale, he must Save DC 13 CON or drop dead immediately.

ARMS

1-5 You mutilate the reprobate’s fingers! He clutches his wounded hand and shoots you a withering glare.

6-10 Your blow mangles the thug’s palm! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

11-15 You slice the two-faced informer’s wrist! He grimaces in pain then snarls insults at you as a yellow light flickers in his eyes.

16-20 You carve the defamer’s hand! He cocks his head at you thoughtfully and you could swear you see a tear roll down his bristly face.

21-25 You score the hood’s elbow! His arm twitches about wildly, perhaps you have grazed a nerve. He suffers -1 on his next attack roll.

26-30 You rent the assassin’s thumb! His hand pours blood, and you see the white of exposed bone.

31-35 Your blow rends the back of the offender’s hand! Several tendons curl up sickeningly under his skin, and he suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

36-40 You lance the raider’s upper arm! Blood spurts out from the wound, his lips curl back with disgust and he bares his filed teeth at you.

41-45 You gouge the bully’s fingers! He shrieks in surprise and flaps his hand this way and that, trying in vain to shake the pain away.

46-50 You hew the wretch’s wrist! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

51-55 You shank the swine’s biceps! He grits his teeth, cinches his head down tight between his shoulders, and coils for his next attack.

56-60 You bury your blade in the villain’s elbow crease! He shakes his head in disbelief and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

61-65 You part the flesh of the thug’s shoulder! He emits a low whine and turn his wounded side away from you. You receive +1 to hit him on your next attack.

66-70 You chop the bandit’s wrist! He shrieks in agony and drops whatever he holds in that hand.

71-75 You rive the defiler’s shoulder joint! His arm flops about like a dying fish and he suffer -2 on his next attack roll.

76-80 You bayonet the blackguard’s forearm! Your blade slides deep into the muscle and he shrieks his discontent in your face.

81-85 You split the rowdy’s elbow! He wails in pain, snorting and cavorting about like a marionette.

86-90 You sever the spy’s triceps! He unleashes a tirade of insults at you, cursing your mother, your siblings, your homeland, and your family crest.

91-95 You incise the assailant’s biceps! In a fit of rage he flexes his muscle to capture your blade, you must make a DC 13 STR Check to wrench it free.

96-00 You bisect the miscreant’s shoulder! He tries to ignore the blood flowing down his arm but soon his hand is coated with it and he suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

HEAD

1-5 You cleave the crown of the antihero’s skull! Bits of grey matter spurt out but he only grins, and moves toward you menacingly.

6-10 You cut the savage’s scalp! Blood drips into his eyes and he suffers -1 to hit for his next attack.

11-15 You lacerate the outlaw’s ear! He howls in pain and claws at the air, as though trying to fend off invisible Stirges.

16-20 You furrow the devil’s nose! Blood and greenish mucus flows down his face. He lips his lips and fixes you with an evil grin.

21-25 You hew the racketeer’s mouth! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

26-30 You shank the assaulter’s tongue! He cries out in surprise, then mumbles something at you wetly, as the blood flows freely from his mouth.

31-35 You slit the murderer’s neck! The gurgling sound he makes tells you he is not long for this world. He must Save DC 13 CON at the end of each round, or drown in his own blood.

36-40 You sunder the desperado’s cheek! He wails in agony, attempts to hold together the cut flesh with one hand, and suffers -2 to hit for the remainder of the combat.

41-45 You stab the troublemaker’s eye! He stands bolt upright for a moment as though transfixed, then shrieks like a stuck pig. He nurses his wounded eye, blood and pus stream down his face and he suffers -2 on all attack rolls for the duration of combat.

46-50 You gash the beast’s forehead! He howls to the black and distant stars, then wipes the blood from his eyes in defiance.

51-55 You slash the backbiter’s orbital ridge! He gropes at the wound, thinking perhaps that he has lost an eye. Finding his eye intact, he leers at you and shakes his head menacingly.

56-60 You slice the attacker’s scalp! Blood sprays out from the wound; all within 10′ make a DC 12 DEX Save or suffer -2 on their next action roll, due to the blood in their eyes.

61-65 You sever the mischief-maker’s ear! The ear flops onto the ground and your adversary stands stunned for an instant. Blood begins to pour from the spot where his ear once was, and he shrieks at you in insolent rage.

66-70 You bisect the mobster’s nose! Blood and snot pour from the wound, he attempts to speak, but it comes out garbled and gurgling.

71-75 You cut deep into the blackmailer’s chin! He gasps at the pain, his newly cloven chin has the look of a hoof, and you cannot help but to chuckle at your handiwork.

76-80 You lacerate the rapscallion’s nose! He makes a terrible, high-pitched grunt and suffers -2 on all attack rolls for the remainder of the combat.

81-85 You rive your adversary’s cheeks! He attempts to shriek but this proves difficult with a mouthful of blood.

86-90 You chop down upon the top of the crook’s skull! His cranial ridge must be sturdy indeed for your blow would’ve fallen many a wild boar. Your opponent, however, appears largely unfazed.

91-95 You rend the creep’s throat! The fountain of blood that pours down his chest means he is not long for this world. He must Save DC 13 CON at the end of each round or die immediately.

96-00 You bury your blade between the swine’s eyes! You wrench it free with some effort; your adversary lets out a low moan and suffers -2 on all attack rolls for the remainder of combat.