Combat Insults for Rogues!

What do you call a guy who hangs out with Heroes?  A Rogue!

1. “Used to call em’ Thieves, now ever-one calls em’ Rogues.  Still a stealin’, stabbin’ lot, mind you.  But with fancy brandin’.”

2. “That shadow has a distinctly Rogue-like shape.  Dark hood?  Check.  Short sword in belt?  Check.  Soft leather boots?  Check.  Look at him now–still thinks he’s hiding.  Isn’t that darling?”

3. “Oh, Rogues is potent in combat.  Long as they goes first, and their blades is poisoned, and nobody knows they’re coming.”

4. “Knew a Halfling Rogue once who hid behind his comrades in battle.  He’d hide fer a bit, then pop out like a jack-in-a-box, shoot his little bow, an’ pop back to hide again.  Till’ one day the Half-Orc Barbarian mistook him fer a Goblin.  Smashed his little head good.  And that were the end of that.”

5. “Ever met a High-Elf Rogue?  They’ll steal from ya’, and belittle ya’ at the same time.  Terrible, confusin’ feelin’.  Don’t recommend it at all.”

6. “Oho!  Studded leather armor!  Might as well wear a sign that says you’re a thief.”

7. “I see that you have two rapiers.  Will you be using both of those together today, or is it in case one breaks?”

8. “So ya open doors, an’ ya move real quiet, an’ ya hide a lot.  Don’t tell me ya get a full share o’ the treasure fer that?

9. “Rogues like to go first–sometimes.  First up the wall, sure.  And first to get a shot off.  But first in the marching order?  Nah.  And never, ever first to pay the bill.”

10. “The Rogues we know, they make bad friends, they leads you down to bitter ends, they unlocks doors, they picks up tacks, they stabs the bad guys in their backs, they opens chests and palms the jewels, they pilfers silk right off the spools, but when at last you spy a ring, or wand, or staff, or shiny thing, they snatch it when you turn around, and sell it down in Goblin Town!”

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